Creating a Safe Place for Questions

In Banned Questions about the Bible, Christian Piatt describes having a Bible thrown at him for asking too many questions. I had some very patient, forgiving teachers and youth leaders growing up. Not that they were always comfortable with some of my questions, but they didn’t tell me to stop asking. However, later, I encountered some who not only weren’t comfortable with questions about God and faith, but were defensive to the point of being hostile. Responses like “God said it, I believe it, that settles it” or “You’re disagreeing with God” when I didn’t see things the same as they did didn’t convert me to their way of thinking. Instead, I quit coming to their gatherings and, after a while, drifted away from church for many years. 

I read an article on Ministry Matters about creating A Safe Place to Doubt. It’s worth a read if you have time. A leading reason people leave the church is that they don’t feel their questions or doubts were welcomed. The author contends that churches should be the place where people can ask questions:

“Those of us inside the church have the responsibility to make a space where doubters can bring their questions safely into the sanctuary. Creating that space is easier said than done, of course. But as someone who left the church and returned, I know we have the power to affect this generation of doubters. And that power is less about answers than it is about tone, space and spirit.”

Not only will we wrestle with some difficult passages in the Bible, but we’ll explore questions about the Bible itself and about God. I want to create a forum where people can share their thoughts without fearing a less than hospitable reaction. Each of us brings a unique understanding of God, the Bible, and what it means to be a follower of Jesus. We all have an opportunity to grow when we share that with each other. That’s what I hope will come out of these discussions. 

Even in the best blogs about faith, the comment section can sometimes erupt. People can be quite passionate about what they believe. When we talk about God or faith with others, we’ll likely encounter differences. How we handle our disagreements makes a big difference. 

I’ve read a number of rules for comment etiquette on blogs. Some are as short as “Don’t be a jerk and don’t do anything illegal.” Others post a long set of rules of behavior and heavily moderate comments. While I’m more of a “don’t be a jerk” kind of moderator, I want to make sure that the discussion remains constructive and that people feel comfortable posting comments. So here are a few things to keep in mind:

“Love God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind…. Love your neighbor as yourself.”  Matthew 22:37-38

“Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”  John 12:34-35 

Maybe you were expecting more. But if we begin with a foundation in love and seek to treat each other with love, other things fall into line. Keep things positive. It’s okay to be passionate about something, but don’t let that passion get in the way of courtesy and respect for others. We can debate different perspectives without attacking the person. I will offer reminders if it seems to me that the discussion is getting too heated. I will delete comments that I feel are not constructive or are mean-spirited. While I don’t expect it here, I will ban trolls – those who disrupt the conversation with inflammatory or off-topic comments intended to provoke emotional reactions. I’m not perfect, so if you feel that I missed something or that I’ve gotten carried away, please let me know.

Because we want a discussion, I leave you with Seven Rules of Engagement for discussing the Bible, offered by Rachel Held Evans:

1) I won't question your commitment to the Bible just because you interpret it differently than I do. 
2) I won’t use the Bible as a proof-texting weapon of mass destruction. 
3) I won’t accuse you of “picking and choosing” when we all employ some selectivity when interpreting and applying the Bible.
4) I will use the word “biblical” properly—as a descriptive adjective, not a prescriptive one. 
5) I won’t use the words “plain” or “clear” when referring to an ancient collection of stories, poems, letters, laws, history, prophecy, and philosophy—all written in a language and culture very different from my own.
6) I will keep in mind that my interpretation of the Bible is only as inerrant as I am.
7) I will use the Bible as a conversation-starter, not a conversation-ender.