Why do we have such a hard time with grace?

I recently came across a speech Francis Su, a mathematics professor from Harvey Mudd College, gave after receiving a prestigious teaching award. He used his acceptance speech to talk about how the lesson of grace has helped him as a teacher:

“Your accomplishments are NOT what make you a worthy human being.You learn this lesson when someone shows you GRACE: good things you didn't earn or deserve, but you're getting them anyway.I have to learn this lesson over and over again.  You can have worthiness apart from your performance.  You can have dignity independent of achievements.  Your identity does not have to be rooted in accomplishments.  You can be loved for who you are, not for what you’ve done---somebody just has to show you grace.”

Here’s the link to The Lesson of Grace in Teaching. It’s a little long, but worth reading. When I had to talk to my oldest son this week about his school challenges, it reminded me that he might need grace more than a lecture on applying himself. 

Grace is the foundation of the good news Jesus brought us. Our accomplishments are NOT what make us worthy to God. God loves us for who we are, not what we've done, or even what we will do. 

I think most of us want to embrace that in our hearts, but we struggle with the implications in our minds because it’s so counter to today’s culture. We live in a society that measures worthiness by where we live, what we do, how much we earn, and what we accomplished. We embrace the image of the “self-made” person who rose to the top, presumably with no assistance from anyone and no privilege based on birth or circumstances. And we've bought the converse that the poor or needy are that way only because they haven’t put in the effort. “There’s no such thing as a free lunch” is used to justify building barriers between the privileged and the needy. 

But that’s not the grace Jesus brings to us. Many of us have problems with the parable of the workers in the vineyard (Matthew 20:1-16). Jesus says the kingdom of heaven is like the landowner who hired workers for his vineyard. He hired some early in the morning, some later in the day, some near the end of the day. Then he paid them all the same wages. When the morning workers grumbled because they were paid the same as those who only worked an hour, the landowner said, “I am not being unfair to you, friend…. I want to give the one who was hired last the same as I gave you. Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?”

That’s not the American way. But that’s God’s way. 

The late Michael Spencer, known as the Internet Monk, called grace “dangerous stuff.” In Our Problem With Grace, he argues that “the Bible is incomprehensible apart from grace,” which brings “salvation for all people.” The problem many have with this promise of grace is the lack of strings God attaches to it. What’s the motivation for being good if grace is as good as it seems? Why should the workers put in a whole day if the ones who only come at the end of the day get the same reward? 

People worried about “cheap grace” try to add a “but…” to grace. Grace, but you have to obey the commandments… but you have to serve in the church… but you have to behave accordingly. Spencer says that’s putting the emphasis in the wrong place. Obedience doesn't create grace. That’s the legalism trap. Instead, our desire to follow God’s commands is a response to grace. Grace points to God, not to us. We may not be perfect – nobody is – but God doesn't give up on us. Spencer writes: 

“Grace loves so unconditionally that it will not abandon a person to his own rebellion and waywardness without a fight….Grace doesn't approve [of our outrageous behaviors]. Grace just refuses to give up on us.”

If it’s all about God, where does that leave us? How do we live out this life of grace? I liked the last part of Francis Su's speech, where he acknowledges “Jesus as the ultimate giver and source of grace, endowing all human beings with worth and dignity that they don’t have to earn.” He suggests several ways grace can shape our lives.

• Because grace affirms our dignity, we can affirm the dignity of others by getting to know them by name, spending time with them, and sharing our joy with them.
• Since our performance doesn’t define us, we are free to try things without fear about failing. In fact, we can fail without worrying what others think.
• Because we often learn our most meaningful lessons when we struggle, we can share those lessons with others. We can help affirm the struggles of others, letting them know they’re not alone.
• We can share our weaknesses without fear of what others think because our worthiness is not in our accomplishments… and our worth is not diminished by our failures. 

What do you think?
Do you believe grace is as simple as "God loves you based solely on who you are and not what you have done (or not done)"? 
Is grace truly unconditional?
Some people practice spiritual disciplines as a way of becoming more obedient and faithful. Michael Spencer said that grace doesn't grow from obedience, but that obedience can grow out of faith. Do you think that’s true? Why or why not?
What are some ways God’s grace has freed you from worrying about what others think?
How do you share that grace with others?